20 Life-Changing Life Skills to Learn in Your 20s

Agh, the 20s! The decade where everyone says you should have fun, experiment with life, experiment with yourself, travel, explore, be wild, and graduate, find a decent job, build a career, get married, and possibly have at least one child… Which one is it then?

Can you do all these things in 10 years? Should you?

Being in your 20s is confusing, stressful, frustrating, and unique, all simultaneously. These are the years you will most likely be by yourself more than during any other decade of your life.

In your childhood, you were with your parents, your 30s and onwards are the years most of us settle and have families.

But the 20s are that sweet and sour candy you cannot get enough of but truly wish to spit out … yes, at the same time. At least, that is what it was for me.

Today, I share with you 20 life-changing life skills to learn in your 20s that will get you to love that decade of your life and feel like you’ve done your best with it.

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20 Skills To Master In Your 20s

1. Mental health skills

Since this is the decade where you meet the world for the first time, it is also the decade when you meet yourself alone in this world for the first time. And that is when your mental health gets challenged.

Learning the early signs of burnout, too much stress, and coping with your own emotions is a crucial skill to master in your 20s.

Here are a few ways to actually learn about mental health:

• Read books on mental health and coping skills
• Attend seminars by professionals
• Signs up for mental health courses

2. Relationship skills

If there is just one relationship skill you must learn in your 20s, that would be to recognize and leave abusive relationships.

Here’s the thing.

I have another blog about love and relationships, and I am beyond shocked by the number of comments I get on this one thing: abusive relationships.

Most people mistake abuse with disrespect, and while they go together most of the time, there are also differences between them. If someone disrespects you, it doesn’t always mean that’s abuse.

Yet, it’s insane how many people stay in abusive relationships hoping for things to get better when I immediately see that this will never happen.

Learn to leave abusive relationships while you still can, in your 20s, because your 30s will try to convince you that nothing better is going to come.

3. The skill to say NO

People pleasing and saying yes to everything is a trend when you are in your 20s. Scratch that! Learn that saying No is your right, and there is nothing wrong with it.

Saying No (respectfully and politely) is liberating and builds self-confidence and self-esteem. It is a crucial skill to master as it will save you so much stress and anxiety later on.

4. The skill to be happy

Believe it or not, this is a skill, and most of us skipped the lessons on how to be happy numerous times in life.

The 20s is your time to learn what makes you calm, what excites you, and what makes you happy. It is the perfect decade to explore your inner world, soak its wisdom and shape yourself the way you want to be. Sounds like a fairytale talk?

Here’s why you need that in your 20s.

Leaving the second decade of your life, you will be one of those two:

• anxious and stressed out that you’ve missed opportunities or didn’t do your best
• confident that whatever you did was a matter of choice and you take full responsibility for the life you’ve built for yourself.

None of those statements said that you would be financially well; you’ll have a job, a partner, a home. However, both of them described a possibility for your inner state of mind.

Happiness is, indeed, a state of mind, and you can see happy people who struggle financially and wealthy people who cry themselves to sleep six nights a week.

Learning what makes you happy, what calms you down, what brings you positive emotions is your obligation in your 20s. I know it because I didn’t do it, and to learn such a thing in your 30s is a bigger challenge.

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5. Learn to recognise when someone doesn’t want you in their life

Regardless if it’s a romantic relationship, a colleague from the uni or the office, someone from the social circle around you… learning when to step away from your relationship with that person saves you disappointment.

It doesn’t save you the pain of realizing someone doesn’t want you in their close circle, but it saves you time and effort to nurture something that doesn’t exist.

6. Social skills

People skills and being able to have a decent conversation with someone you just met is something I wish I had learned in my 20s. And that is why I advise you to focus on it.

The events from the last few years stopped people from socializing in real life. I often walk in the shops and feel awkward; having too many people around gives me anxiety and blurs my mind.

Feeling confident around people, starting a conversation with a stranger, and being okay with asking questions is a challenge to me, but it shouldn’t be this way for you.

Master your social skills while you’re younger. Find that one friend who “gets it” and observe their body language, their posture, listen to how they approach the world.

One of the absolute bestsellers of all time on building social skills, winning friends, and making people love you is Dale Carnegie’s book How To Win Friends & Influence People. You can listen for free to its audio version by clicking here.

7. Learn to stand up for yourself

Agh, all those moments when we freeze and cannot say anything to the cheeky person in front of us… And then we go home and think all evening of all the ways we could’ve said something.

Standing up for yourself is a matter of self-respect and self-love. It is also a challenge, a step out of your comfort zone, and a confidence boost. But it’s hard. It is so hard that most of us just do nothing for various reasons.

Learn to stand up for yourself regardless of how many people’s feelings will get hurt. Yes, you read that right. I am not saying: be rude and offend people. Be your defender, and don’t stay on the ground if someone pushes you there.

8. Learn discipline

If there is one skill you honestly wouldn’t want to miss learning in your 20s, it would be this one.

Discipline will get you anywhere. It will help you graduate with good grades. It will help you build learning habits, healthy habits, work habits. Discipline will make people trust you and choose you for big and better projects.

Discipline will wake you up before everyone and work on your dream life. It will keep you focused on the long-term rewards rather than chasing short-term pleasures. Discipline is the one skill most people around you won’t have, and that is what will put you one step ahead of them.

9. Learn money skills

Making money isn’t the only skill you need to master in your 20s. Budgeting that money, saving it, spending it wisely, investing it, multiplying it… These are all skills you cannot overlook in your 20s because they will lay the foundation of a more comfortable life later on.

10. Learning to choose your habits

If you open Youtube and start typing “healthy habits to have” you will most likely see long videos of morning and evening routines that take forever to learn and put into practice. Most of the authors of those videos are young people in their 20s or early 30s.

All is well until you have to follow those routines and find out that you need an extra day on your calendar to make that happen. That happens because most of the Youtubers’ job is actually to have those habits. They are lifestyle vloggers and have the time to tick 13 things off their lists before 8 a.m.

I’ve always started my habit posts with the disclaimer that if you decide to build a routine, you should pick only the habits that will serve you – nothing more and nothing less.

But unless you are a lifestyle blogger/vlogger, your job is to select wisely only the things that serve you and leave the rest aside.

11. Learn to look past your mistakes

We get to a serious part of this post – life mistakes and coping with them.

You would most likely enter your 20s with big hopes, dreams, and plans. We all did that. Some of us succeeded. Some of us failed. However, both groups had to deal with mistakes along the way.

Learning to never see mistakes as such is a skill you will love yourself for. Every mistake is just a lesson regardless of whether you will go after the desired result or not.

Mistakes don’t happen. Lessons do.

12. Learn how to cook

Did you expect this one here?

Cooking is a skill you need to have and will use every day of your life. Frying an egg isn’t cooking. But making a warm soup on a winter night, preparing a stew for your family or breakfast for your partner on a lazy Sunday morning… all those “movie-like” moments happen only if you actually know how … well, cook.

13. Learn the skill of stepping out of your comfort zone

Your biggest enemy usually stays on the other side of the mirror… Yes, in your 30s, you know that your 20s would’ve been great if you weren’t afraid of… everything.

Stepping out of your comfort zone might be painful, scary, and often leads to disappointment. However, it is also liberating, eventful, exciting, promising, and builds up your confidence and self-trust.

Stepping out of your comfort zone is challenging, but just as it suggests – it is one step at a time. Start with the little things you avoid because they feel uncomfortable. Then slowly expand the circle and include more challenging ideas. Here are 30 things that will most likely push you out of your comfort zone, and that is good.

14. Learn self-compassion and self-love

Did I already mention that you are your biggest enemy?

Many mornings you will wake up, go to the bathroom and look at your reflection in the mirror. You will quickly criticize your appearance there, scold yourself for not exercising, for having a messy house, for not pleasing your partner often enough, for not exercising every day, for not calling your parents for weeks, for not being your best at work… the list will go on forever. It will be a different combination every day.

This is how you slowly build yourself as your worst enemy. Use your 20s to train yourself to be your best friend instead.

Your best friend will support you, comfort you, and encourage you to love yourself no matter what. If you don’t learn that one skill in your 20s, it will affect you for the rest of your life.

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15. Learn how to keep your friends

In your 20s you will meet a lot of people. You will get annoyed by most of them. You will appreciate a few. And you will love even fewer.

Learning how to nurture a friendship and keep the important people around you is a life-changing skill to have. It doesn’t only open your doors to a world of possibilities (plenty of connections), but it creates a circle of a “second family” that will be by your side even when your own family isn’t.

Ready to keep your friends around? Listen to Dale Carnegie’s book How To Win Friends & Influence People for free by clicking here.

16. Learn how to set boundaries

The 20s is the time when you wouldn’t really mind it if people pushed your boundaries. Yes, it’s annoying, but chances are, you do the same with theirs. However, in your 30s, you will be deeply affected by your own inability to set those boundaries.

Start in your 20s.

17. Learn how to make memories that matter

Here’s an unpopular opinion – real life matters more than virtual life.

Social media is great; it’s convenient, connects you with people quickly and efficiently, saves time, and so on… But looking into someone’s eyes, holding their hand, sharing the same view, sipping coffee together and talking about life on a Saturday afternoon, traveling together, enjoying a meal together… all those things are real-life experiences no social media can transmit.

Learn which memories matter and create more of them.

18. Learn how to cope with stress

As mentioned above, stress is inevitable nowadays. It is only a matter of “how stressed” we are and not a matter of “stressed or not stressed”.

Learning stress relief in your 20s could save your life (literally). But different people relieve stress in different ways, so you want to find yours. For example, I cope with stress by journaling, crafting, and binge-watching Netflix.

19. Learn how to hold on to your inner child and love it

One thing that would often happen in your 20s is “the fall” of your inner child. Immersed in a world of challenges, stress, possibilities, opportunities, and responsibilities, your inner child gets forgotten and slowly stops bothering you.

Learn how to nurture your relationship with it, regardless of what others say. And yes, I am talking about self-prioritizing, self-love, and self-care.

And most of all…

20. Learn how to have fun

It’s one of those cliches you truly can’t overlook. The 20s is a great time of your life. It might be the best time of your life (not guaranteed, I love my 30s more). Regardless, it is your obligation to have fun and enjoy life as much as possible.

Final Thoughts

Before I leave you to enjoy your best decade ever, it is time to remind you that all that truly matters is your happiness. Even if you master three things in your 20s – how to fry an egg, how to say No and how to tie your shoes… al it matters is that those are the things that make you confident and happy.

What are your 20 life skills you wouldn’t want to skip on in your 20s? What is it that you wish to learn, explore and master in your first decade as an adult? And don’t worry, it could be anything from sawing to signing up for an expedition to Mars…