How to be happy alone? Learning To Enjoy Yourself
How to enjoy your own company?
Unless you are a skilled introvert, there’s a chance you’re struggling with being alone and enjoying yourself.
Especially with all the events of 2020.
Life is a challenge, even as it is. To appreciate its highs and lows, we also need to understand the power of enjoying our own company.
And I’m not exaggerating.
Loneliness and The Realization You Are Lonely
No matter the reason, though, you are alone, at home, and with no plans for the evening.
Probably with no plans for the weekend.
And it doesn’t matter if your friends are just busy and aren’t actually avoiding you.
You don’t care if you have a partner and he’s occupied with a project, or he’s out of town for work.
All it matters is that you are alone and you don’t know what to do.
It is probably the first time you realize that you don’t know how to enjoy your company.
How Can I Be Content In My Own Company?
The meaning of enjoying your own company is to be able to feel at peace with the idea of being alone, spending time with yourself, and enjoying the little moments even if there’s no one around to share the excitement with.
Enjoying your life also means being appreciative for having that alone-time, using the advantages of being by yourself, and not allowing the thought of being on your own to stop you from living your life meaningfully.
Overcoming Loneliness and Finding Happiness from Within
So, how do you learn to enjoy your own company?
Are there any rules? Any steps to follow?
Finding happiness from within seems to be the most used answer to basically any life-problem.
And it doesn’t matter if we are a bit tired of hearing it because it’s still as relevant as a couple of thousand years ago.
Here’s the thing…
I just love my own company. I love spending time alone, and I enjoy every minute of it.
Yes, I sometimes get bored, but the only reason is that I avoid doing things I know I would enjoy.
So, today I want to share with you my tiny tips on how to start loving your own company and how to chase away the loneliness.
How To Be Happy Alone?
Here are my humble tips on how to fall in love with your own company and actually start preferring it. No, I’m not trying to turn you into an introvert, but just saying… my favorite introvert quote is “Ew, people!“
Get enthusiastic about it
Treat yourself with the same excitement as you would treat a best friend you haven’t seen in a while.
Let me tell you a secret – you haven’t been with yourself truly in a long time.
Are you sure you still know what gives your thrills and what spooks you out?
Get enthusiastic about getting to know yourself.
Uncover yourself in front of You and ask what you would like to do next.
Be polite and gentle with yourself; you would treat like that someone you love.
Feel Your Feelings
I get it.
Being on your own isn’t an ongoing party that never ends.
Feel your feelings, though.
Don’t try to keep yourself busy so you don’t have to face your feelings.
You will eventually end up in self-hatred and disappointment, feeling bored and incapable of loving yourself.
Feel what you feel. Feel who you are.
Get grumpy about it.
Cry it out.
Reconnect with your true self.
Find what it is that you miss the most from the outside world and understand that it’s nothing you cannot deliver yourself to You.
Be okay with the emotions.
Be okay with how you go about the situation.
Be okay with You.
Clear your mind
Next, clear your mind, set free your feelings, forgive yourself for being upset. Connect with your inner self and have your own back.
You are the only person who will be with you for your whole life.
Everyone else is a mere traveler we meet for a few moments – some longer than others.
Therefore, having that loving, deep connection with who we are is so crucial.
Remove Negative Self-Talk
I have a rule for this: If you wouldn’t say it to your best friend, why tell it yourself?
Why making yourself feel miserable with negative self-talk?
You must have your own back.
You want to be fair but not putting yourself down.
The way we see ourselves is the way we treat ourselves.
But the opposite is true.
Negative self-talk is not okay. Imagine someone else was standing in front of you telling you all those things. You would either snap at them, leave the place, or start crying.
So how is that situation different than the one where you’re the speaker?
Appreciate little things
Finding the small blessing you usually would just walk by is what we call “the beauty of life.”
Be that person who notices the way the morning coffee taste with a new wave of pleasure every day.
Be the one who looks towards the sun and silently expresses gratitude for being there.
Be the weirdo who takes that deep breath first thing in the morning and allows peace and calmness to enter his mind.
Free your thoughts. Clear your mind. Appreciate life.
Contemplating yourself and finding out even more
Learn again about your interests. Explore new ways to integrate happiness into your life.
Start small. Start from inside out.
Before searching for the things that could bring happiness, try to find what you should do to create that happiness for yourself.
Make your space beautiful, especially if you live alone.
Let your mind freely shape the world around you in a way that reflects You.
Change your curtains, get flowers, candles, new wine glasses, a cozy throw, a mug you will love preparing hot chocolate in.
These would be the things I would do. What are yours?
Once a day Give Yourself a Gift
Learn to spoil yourself in a way nobody else spoiled you before. We fall in love with people who make us happy. Make yourself happy, and you will naturally start enjoying your own company.
Give yourself a gift every single day.
For example, here’s what I was doing while learning to enjoy my own alone-time.
Every day I was asking myself this: What can I do for myself today? What is the one thing within my control (and I can do today) that will make me happy?
Then I delivered.
Sometimes that was a movie. Often it was a nap. Sometimes it was a walk in the park. Maybe a book. Often it meant decluttering some old papers. Lately, it’s been journaling and crafting.
You don’t need to buy yourself something every day. But you want to give yourself a gift every day.
What would that gift be today? Pause for a second and think about it. I’ve got a surprise list below for you. We’ll get to it in a second.
Before that, though…
Love is a verb
You’ve heard that.
But here’s the thing.
Self-love is a verb too.
Enjoying your own company is a chain of different actions, little steps you must make towards yourself.
Learn to love who you are, and you will automatically start enjoying your own company.
Get over the shame of being alone and doing stuff on your own.
What to do to start enjoying your own company? Here comes the fun stuff!
30 Little things you could absolutely do on your own and love it
See below 30 ideas – things you could do when you’re are alone and learning to enjoy and contemplate your own company.
Some of them are one-time activities; some of them are hobby ideas.
However, all of the ideas below give you a chance to explore and love yourself actually to get out of your comfort zone.
1. Coloring books
You can get some beautiful coloring books for adults and wake up your creative side.
Try yourself in baking. It can sometimes take a while to learn how to cook all those delicious cookies and cakes. Use your free time to learn how to bake your favorite desserts (check Marta Stweart’s new gorgeous book on baking perfect cakes).
As simple as that. Walk in the park. By the lake. Walk around your town center. Walk.
4. Going to a restaurant alone. Depending on where you live, if you have restaurants still working – dine there by yourself. It’s the most liberating thing you could do to learn to enjoy your own company.
5. Start a hobby you’ve always wanted to try.
6. Learn a new skill. What better thing to do with your free time than learning a new skill – whatever it is the skill you want to master, Skillshare allows you to do it (I recently had a web-design rush, and they have awesome suggestions).
7. Learn a new language.
You can start with beginner level by yourself, just by watching Youtube videos. Learning a new language is so fun and liberating.
8. Gardening/Houseplants care
9. Roller skating. Find the child within you and let it roam free around the neighborhood.
10. Yoga. Again, Youtube gives you awesome selections of beginner level videos to get you on the right path. All you need some fun eco-friendly yoga mat to keep you inspired.
More Ways To Enjoy Your Own Company and Have Fun When Alone
11. Single player boardgames. Yes, there are solo games like this one on Amazon.
13. Wood-burning. Yes, there are actually charming little kits that will allow you to explore wood-burning and maybe create something of your own. How cool is that?
15. Go to movies alone. Another hard-to-do-alone activity you probably avoid going for. But it’s fun, and it will make you see yourself from a different angle. I recommend!
16. Hiking. Reserve your weekends for hiking.
18. Picnic by yourself. If the weather is nice, pack yourself a sandwich, a good book, and a favorite drink and go out for a picnic.
19. Teach yourself things from Youtube. You can find videos on how to do basically anything. Search for what came to your mind right now.
20. Start an at-home business. Trust me, working on your business can keep you busy all the time, and the wave of new ideas will get you inspired and pumped.
Hobbies, DIYs, and more things to do when you are alone
21. Silversmith. Why not create your own jewelry? It’s a great hobby and creative activity you might turn into a business.
22. Experimenting with dyeing your clothes. Get your own tie-dye kit and see if you could come up with a new trend.
23. Stick and Poke Tattoo Kit. Are you a tattoo fan? Don’t tell me you’ve never imagined you’re a tattoo artist? Get your own kit and see if it’s something you enjoy spending your time on.
24. Listening to podcasts you love.
25. Walking your dog. Having a puppy is the best thing you could get yourself this year. The joy of that little soul will bring sparkles into your life.
26. Reading a book by a lake or a river. Don’t tell me you’ve never imagined yourself reading a book by a lake. Why not actually doing it?
27. Collecting leaves in autumn time. It’s one of my favorite activities once the leaves start falling in October. It’s almost a meditative experience for me. Have you tried it?
28. Meditation. Being in solitude with yourself. In peace. Finding the quiet calmness of the world around you and the world in yourself.
29. Journal. Daily journaling, art journaling, morning pages, gratitude journaling. Start any journaling you feel will help you enjoy spending time alone.
30. Write. Creative writing is different than journaling but an equally liberating activity that pokes your inner self to unfold its words onto the white paper. Try it.
Conclusion on how to enjoy your own company
Essentially, learning to enjoy your own company is rediscovering yourself and falling in love with yourself and life all over again. It’s a journey we all need at least a few times in our lives.
Your won company is all you have all the time – have your own back, treat yourself with respect and gratitude, enjoy life as it is, no matter how crazy that sounds.
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